We've been taught from a very young age that the definition of success is when you finally climb to the top of that corporate ladder, putting in many hours, and filling that bank account. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with that definition of success. For some, that is the epitome of true success. And again I say, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that if that is what fits you.
On the flip side, we've also been taught that, until we reach that particular definition of success, we are lesser than. From an early age, many of us have been shoved into that box until we can't breathe. Trudging through life feeling miserable and thinking, "Is this all there is?" This, my friends, is the Matrix. The system that's been unknowingly set up for us to make us fall in line and be good little tax-paying soldiers. The fact is, we are all so uniquely different, the definition of success is just as uniquely different for all of us. You may ask, "What do you mean, Be?" Well, I'm about to tell you a little story that redefined what success means to me.
I was sitting at my desk at my last job. For those who don't know, I was the Administrative Assistant at my church. Anyway, I was sitting there working on something when one of the church members came in and started chatting. I always enjoyed chatting with her. She was several years older than me and I liked to hear her thoughts and get her input on many topics. This particular day, she said, "Can I ask you a question? And I'm not trying to offend you by asking this." I said, "Sure. Go ahead." It took her a minute before she said, "You're so talented at what you do, why aren't you more successful?" My response was, "Good question."
At the time, I was only working 20 hours a week. That's all they offered then, but it worked for me. My daughter had been going through some issues and needed me home more than she needed me gone earning a bigger paycheck. It was a difficult decision to cut back and lose money in order to be the mother she needed. Now, although I was only working part-time, I still put in very full days. Up by 6 to make sure my daughter was up and getting ready for school, drop her off, then back home to start getting myself ready for work, wake little man up, get him fed and ready for school while I finished getting ready. Once I dropped him off (along with several of the neighborhood kids...good thing I drove a van!), I would drive straight to work. I would put in a 4 hour shift before running out the door and driving straight to the high school in time to pick up my daughter. Whew! We would get home just ahead of little man (all the kids liked to walk home in a big group, weather permitting). If the weather was bad, we would park next door to his school so he would see us when he passed by and hop in. Many of those times I would have several other kds hop in too, and I would drive them home as well. Once we got home, snack time and if I had any errands to run, I would be back out the door. Oh, what's that? Time to start dinner already? Yikes! And so, we would finish off the day with dinner, homework for my daughter while I took litte man to practice for whichever sport he was in depending on the season. Once we got back from practice, maybe a little family tv time or reading and chilling, help my daughter with projects that were more extensive than plain homework, bedtime then rinse and repeat the next day. Guess what! Even with practically nothing, basically living in poverty, my children thrived!
Why did I tell you all this? Well, that question of "why I wasn't more successful" stayed with me for a long time. I watched my daughter graduate with honors and a hefty academic scholorship, along with a smaller art scholarship for the college she chose, and a big dose of self-respect and morals. I watched my little man embrace the brotherhood and friendships that came from being on sports teams. I made new friends with like-minded parents through those sports and learned the joy of embracing the life I had while having the opportunity to hone my skills with computers and graphics. Is that not a form of success?
Think about it. What is it you do that brings you joy. What have you accomplished that you didn't think you could, but tried anyway, and it turned out better than you envisioned?
From the person who dreams of having a garden or farm and grows their first successful crop, to that person staring at a pile of metal scraps with a welder in hand and creates their first unique sculpture. From the person who has always loved to bake from home and flips that open sign on their brand new bakery, to the person who melts and blends their first batch of coconut and shea butters with essential oils and winds up with their first perfect tray of natural soaps. From the person who chooses their child's well-being over a paycheck, to the person who climbed that corporate ladder and acquired a cush bank account. Are those not all success stories?
"Does success mean the same for everyone?" The answer is NO! Succeess means many different things to many different people. All beautiful. All unique. Not one better than the other.
My encouragement to you is to take that leap out of the Matrix box and bring out that seed that's been pushed to the back of your mind for so long. Take a deep breath and exhale then jump in with both feet. Find joy in your creations no matter what they may be. Before you know it, you will have honed your skill, you will have built your confidence, and you will have a product to sell and many new success stories to share with the world!
So you tell me....What is YOUR definition of success? Think about it!
Much Love!
-Be